Finals...

I have three tomorrow, my last one Wednesday, and had two on Friday. I've been drowning in tests and bubble sheets. I had insomnia last night and did nothing. I took a sleeping pill, and promised my self that I wouldn't take a three hour nap today. It kind of sucks that the semester is over. Yeah, I'll be back in the fall. But, some of the friends I have now won't be back in the fall. I also feel like I've wasted a lot of my time thinking I wanted to be a comm major. I would probably have a better GPA this semester if i didn't take broadcast ops. That class was a rude awakening that I guess I needed in order to get out. Next semester I have 2 studio art classes. That should be fun. I hope all my aspirations that come with being an art major can happen. If it doesn't I'll be kind of screwed and poor. I don't want to be an art teacher. I hate explaining things. It also doesn't pay enough. Kids are also evil in groups. All ages too, even high school. I'd rather invest money in an art studio in a big city and risk it all. I know I'm not going to regurgitate styles from Picasso or Van Gogh. I'm going to have my own. So, it should be worth something. I also want to work in several different medias. I need to study for finals first...

Changing Majors.

Mass Communications hasn't been working for me. It isn't fun for me and it just makes me miserable. I don't really care for it anymore. the idea of getting up every morning before the sun does to make bank just sounds depressing. So I'm changing to Art? Why Art? I have an appreciation for it and have the mind for it. I spent most of high school doodling over my notes and had some of the better pieces in my art classes. I just never saw the occupation as being practical? But, now I don't care. I just want to do something that will make me happy. Having an art studio in the basement of my house to work in will make me happy. I just want to make something beautiful instead of feeding people canned journalism. The whole senate thing doesn't seem like fun either. It's not going to be like SGA was. I'm also totally going to Georgia after next year. I need to start looking at schools.

It's Over.

I just got out of spending 4 months liking someone who wasn't worth it. I think I knew in the back of my mind the whole time when I used the excuse, "You can't help who you like." He wasn't like all the clean cut boys I'd liked before. I thought maybe I was special. But, maybe I was just digging through the garbage after being single so long. He was an asshole, but he made me laugh. I did have fun with him too. It was kind of like a tie dye phase. It's fun and cool, but has and end. Only trashy people pretend it doesn't. I'm not trashy. Where am I going with this? Anyways it's over. I could have made many more mistakes that wasting precious time that could have been used on school work or sleeping. I felt and looked like a zombie yesterday. Maybe because I was a little hung over. But still... When it was finally over, I was relieved. I was out of the torturous cycle. I could have thew opportunity to wear something nicer than tie dye. But, at the same time it's hard to let go. I missed the idea of him and having someone to kick it with. But, I don't miss him. I just need to come up with better ideas. I looked in the mirror today as I was getting ready. I was happy that I could still look at myself. I was also glad that I was not other side. I'm not a phase at all, I am a classic.

Time to reacess

I have been doing a lot of thinking lately and I need to reorganize my life. I can't be slacking in my classes at all and figure out what it is that I want out of life. I know I am not going to be in this small town forever. I don't want to be. I also want to live a quality life. First I need to work harder in school. I show up and turn stuff in. But, I've been procrastinating. I'm not going to not study for any one. It's my life in the end. I have to deal with the consequences. I also don't want to be at my school for my senior year. My mom and her boyfriend are moving to Georgia and I'll just go to a school over there and be with them. I can also find work at the country club. There is a lot in Georgia for me to do with Broadcasting. The CNN center isn't too far away and probably has some good internships. I have my head back on and a big opportunities ahead of me.

Procrastination Nation

I have only read 3 chapters in a book I need to have a review ready for at 8 a.m. Monday. I still haven't even gotten through my study guide or studied for a test I have Monday. Might I mention this is my second time in that class? I should be thanking my teacher for having a guide this time around; instead of kicking the work aside. I also have to know about connectors, RGBs, and studio lights for broadcast ops. Oh... almost forgot about that play by play that is due before Monday.
I just feel so tired lately. From nothing. Also very disinterested in school work that is supposed to be my number 1 priority.
What have I been doing, you might ask...
I made lemonade from scratch.
Downloaded 54 songs.
Watched 2 episodes of Cashmere Mafia today.
Made Strawberry Muffins filled with Nutella.
Polished all the furniture in the house.
Dusted.
Cleaned and organized my Mom's room to show her that I love her.
Organized my closet.
tried the vacuum Louise gave me.
checked the mail.
did laundry that wasn't mine.
found a quarter.
a 3rd of my government study guide.
wrote this blog.

I need to go on and do things. I have too much time on my hands to not be doing work.

Spring Break Playlist

1. Alone Again(naturally)- Guilbert O'Sullivan
2. Mississippi Mud- Hank III
3. Smoke & Mirrors- RJD2
4. Breakadawn- De La Soul
5. I'm Not In Love- 10cc
6. Tired Of Being Alone- Al Green
7. Bankrupt On Selling- Modest Mouse
8. Dirty Trip- Air

Changes

I've noticed a lot of changes this semester vs. the past few. Having fun has moved up the priority list and things that used to seem important aren't quite so important anymore. Making appearances that the big frat parties and mixers fall into that category. My priorities are now...

1. School (always will be)
2. having fun
3. being healthy

School has been crazy. There is so much going on this week. Baah... Midterms. I think I'll do okay. I just have to keep my shit together... and keep fun number 2.

I used to be really compulsive... well I still kind of am. well, I'm not as compulsive and having fun is important. Stressing isn't cool. I'm also not part of any extra clubs this semester. I don't have time for that. It's annoying when you have 18 hours of school and homework. It isn't much fun either. I don't need any clubs. I'll be in senate again next semester. That actually is fun. But, most of our E.C. is graduating. I didn't miss a meeting last semester and I dressed up. I need to come up with some passable legislation ideas.

Being healthy is important too. I eat well to make up for my lack of exercise. That is also something that takes time and isn't fun. It's also hard to be motivated when you have a perfect body frame. I'm not trying to look muscular. It's also important to be mentally healthy, like taking naps or study breaks. School is so draining. I feel like a zombie sometimes.

Spring Break is next week. I am not doing anything special. Just resting. I really need to chill out. I also need to study.